We all need to blow off some steam sometimes. The problem is that often we don’t know how to do this without exploding in a heated conversation, engaging in self-destructive behaviour, like resorting to way too much comfort food, or worst of all, bottling up our frustrations. Here are seven proven techniques to help you simmer down when you feel stressed.
Get Off the Phone!
If it’s a phone conversation that’s stressing you and the two of you just seem to be going round and round in circles over an issue, respectfully ask the person if you can get back to them or resume the discussion later. When cooler heads prevail, the dialogue may be less tense, or after taking a break from the conversation a mutually palatable solution might spring to mind. Either way, you need to put the brakes on the conversation before the tension escalates or makes you feel like you’re going to burst a blood vessel.
Better yet, periodically take breaks from phones of any kind. Our brains are not designed to feel wired all day long, in constant check-and-respond mode. Studies have been done on the links between typical smartphone use and stress and anxiety levels, and the results are worrying (pun intended). Anyone who discovers my low level of smartphone use always finds it amusing, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Move Away From The Screen
You don’t know how in the world you’re going to meet an impossible deadline but gosh darn it, you’re going to try. So you sit glued to your chair and computer screen. I’m sure you can guess what I’m going to say next. Take a break! In fact, experts say you should look away from your computer at least every 20 minutes and gaze at a distant object, at least 20 feet away, for at least 20 seconds. 20-20-20, easy to remember. At the very least, please remember to blink often. You’d be surprised how long we tend to stare at screens without realising we’re hardly blinking. This is a proven fact.
Staring for long durations at the glaring light emitted from any screen is actually counterproductive and downright unhealthy. The negative effects include physical fatigue, difficulty focusing and increased numbers of work errors, possible headaches, eye strain with symptoms like eye twitching and tired or red eyes.
It is also recommended that we try to stop looking at any type of device at least one hour, preferably two, before you go to sleep. The blue light reportedly wreaks havoc on your sleep cycle and can get in the way of restful sleep. Use the time to talk to your child or spouse, read, reflect on your day…the possibilities are endless.
Set boundaries for screen time so you can feel better rested and more at ease.
Walk It Off
Get up! Yes, I mean it, get up and take a walk to clear your head and get your blood flow going. Like any other form of exercise, a brisk walk can boost your feel-good hormones, endorphins. Or take a leisurely stroll, preferably in a green space like a park, or near the sea. Whatever you do, get up and move. Just a few minutes of walking will make you feel better.
Take Deep Breaths
One of things I will always remember from a workshop led by Iyanla Vanzant was the breathing exercise. I’ve put it to good use over the years, believe me. It helps you to relax immediately and is incredibly easy to do:
- Sit in a chair with your legs hip-distance apart, paying attention to how grounded you feel. Let your hands relax on your legs.
- Breathe in and out deeply and slowly, and notice you feel with each breath – calmer and calmer.
Your body gets an extra dose of oxygen and the tension just fades away.
Visualize
In the operating theatre, the surgical nurse told me to picture my favourite vacation spot and see myself having a good time there. I am sure I went to sleep under general anaesthesia with a smile on my face. And I’m not the only one who can attest to the power of visualization when we need to relax.
The National Center for Complementary & Integrative Health, a division of the U.S. Department of Health, acknowledges that stress management programmes commonly include relaxation techniques such as “guided imagery” – focusing on pleasant images to replace negative or stressful feelings.
Go ahead, try it. Picture yourself in any happy scene; visualize whatever makes you smile.
Pump the Music Up
Do you feel stressed when you’re singing along to your favourite tune? Of course not.
From the calming effect of classical music to the latest party-ready reggae or soca song, if the music moves you, you don’t feel like you have a care in the world. The strains of Mozart, Vivaldi and other classical greats have been proven to reduce anxiety, but any song that makes you feel good will improve your mood immediately.
Whether you use mesmerising music to soothe you or you prefer to pump up the volume in your earphones or the car, the music you love can produce amazing results when you need to relieve any tension from stressful events.
Have a Hearty Fall-Out-Your-Chair Laugh
Laughter is the best medicine, they say. The Mayo Clinic points out that laughter helps you take in more oxygen-rich air, stimulates your heart, lungs and muscles, and increases the endorphins released by your brain.
Now you may wonder: How in the world do I laugh when I’m blue vexed? Just pick your go-to video and have it readily accessible on a device you’ll have with you. My trusty solution is any Mr. Bean snippet, and an episode of Friends is my ideal pick-me-up. As silly as it may sound, a really funny video is a guaranteed relaxation tool.
Speaking of friends, getting together with your buddies can lift your mood too. The social interaction helps us to feel connected to others and when you’re having a rollicking good time, you’ll laugh your worries away.
Recap
When you’re feeling frazzled, like the world is on your shoulders, pick your stress relief technique – stepping away from the phone or the screen, going for a walk, taking deep breaths, visualizing something positive happening to you, listening to music or laughing your head off. Try any one of these and you’ll be amazed at how quickly you feel at ease.
